Salt and Pepper Fest: The List
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hp_goldenageTitle: The List
Author:![[archiveofourown.org profile]](https://p.dreamwidth.org/b164c54b26e4/-/archiveofourown.org/favicon.ico)
torino10154
Characters/Pairings: Severus/Harry/Draco
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: ~1150
Content: Humor, established relationship, references to various sexual activities
Summary/Prompt: Prompt P19: They finally convince Severus to go through with a bonding ceremony with them.
A/N: Thanks to S for the beta! Any mistakes that remain are entirely my own.
Read at AO3 or below:
Severus had just set aside the Daily Prophet Daily Crossword and closed his eyes—Just to rest them, of course. He didn't require a nap to make it through the day as many wizards his age did. What a ridiculous notion—when a herd of Erumpents thundered down the stairs.
"We've done it!"
Severus cracked his eyes open to see Harry holding a scroll of some kind while Draco entered the library at a more civilized pace.
"Done what, dare I ask?" Severus drawled, stretching his back as he sat up more fully.
"Finished your list," Harry replied, beaming. How a man of nearly sixty still gave off such youthful exuberance, Severus didn't know. If it wasn't for the salt and pepper hair and significant lines around his eyes, one might believe Harry was only in his mid-thirties.
"What's he on about, Draco?"
"Your list." Draco smirked at him. When had he become so good at one of Severus's signature expressions? It was unsettling. He, too, looked good for his age, his silvery blond hair having turned mostly white. He kept it longer than Harry did but it still never approached the length Lucius's hair had achieved.
"What list?" He had an inkling but it was always best to feign ignorance so as to not give anything away.
"You swore an oath," Harry said, unrolling the parchment, "that you would bond with us if we completed every task on this list before you turned eighty."
"You can't possibly have done that." Severus crossed his arms over his chest and raised a brow.
Draco took the parchment and began to read. "Harry retired from the Aurors six weeks ago with all of his fingers intact."
"Potter's always been inordinately lucky," Severus said sourly, though he was, of course, quite pleased as Harry's fingers had been known to work magic on Severus's body regularly.
"Draco has equalled your skill in brewing Wolfsbane." There was a note of challenge in Harry's voice and Severus nodded his head once, conceding the point. In fact, as the master potioneer at St Mungo's, Draco's skill rivalled Severus's when it came to potions required in the healing arts.
"Harry has learned to knit a proper jumper," Draco continued. Harry threw open his robes and looked as if he was wearing something that might have come fresh off the knitting needles of Molly Weasley herself. Instead of a large letter H on the front of his jumper, there was an H and a D entwined with a letter S.
"We've travelled to all the continents with you in search of rare potions ingredients, surviving blizzards, earthquakes, tornadoes, and even that tsunami in Fogo," Harry ticked off on his fingers. "Draco's become a yoga instructor—"
"Vinyasa," Draco added.
"—which is why he's so flexible."
Severus had been wondering how Draco managed several of the positions he'd ended up in of late. It was rare that one became more flexible with age but Severus wasn't about to complain when he was so frequently the beneficiary.
"Harry learned to do that thing with his tongue."
Severus licked his lips, a shiver of anticipation running through him. "Oh?"
Harry winked. "Yeah."
"We did not kill each other before the age of fifty." Draco tsked. "You really thought so little of us when you made this list, Severus."
Severus hmphed. "What else is on that damnable list?" When he'd written it, he couldn't have imagined the three of them lasting this long together.
"Taking apart and reassembling a 1970s Muggle wireless," Harry read off, "which I did when I was recuperating from that leg injury."
"Bungee jumping and zip-lining which we did during that trip to Costa Rica for Harry's fiftieth birthday."
"We got the matching tattoos you suggested after we'd all had far too much to drink." Harry stood and tugged his waistband down to reveal the "Property of the Half-Blood Prince" tattoo on his arsecheek.
There was little that gave Severus greater pleasure than seeing Harry's and Draco's bottoms bared with his name branding their pale skin though that was usually because he was about to get a good buggering from the both of them.
"I've topped, bottomed, and found myself in the middle of a Slytherin sandwich," Harry said, coming to sit on the arm of the sofa next to Severus. "Draco has tried every position as well."
"He's worn knickers for you," Draco said, sitting down on the other side of Severus.
Revealing knickers, at that.
"Don't forget Draco's leather trousers," Harry added.
How could Severus forget those? Draco looked divine in leather.
"We've been bound and gagged," Draco continued, his hand running up Severus's thigh.
"Attended formal functions with your wicked sex toys driving us mad."
The ceremony for the thirtieth anniversary of the end of the war was permanently etched into Severus's brain. Harry and Draco had both spent the evening stimulated—perhaps overstimulated, from what he recalled of their expressions at the time—by magically enhanced butt plugs.
It was one of his finest moments, if Severus did say so himself.
"So," Harry continued, taking Severus's hand in his and lacing their fingers together, "as we've finished the list four months before your eightieth birthday, you have to bond with us."
Severus looked to Draco, hoping for support from a fellow Slytherin.
"You gave your word," Draco said solemnly.
"Let me see that parchment again," Severus said, holding out his hand. Harry handed him the scroll and Severus went over the list from beginning to end and then from bottom to top, just to be sure.
"What about this one?" Severus said triumphantly, pointing to an item two-thirds of the way down the scroll.
Draco snatched the parchment from him and examined it closely. "Hmm, he might be right."
"What?" Harry cried. "We read it over several times. What did we miss?"
Draco pointed and rolled his eyes.
Severus held firm. "The list must be complete."
Harry picked up the Daily Prophet and said softly, "Finish your crossword, Severus."
Severus put on his reading glasses and studied the puzzle anew. His heart began to race as processed the meaning of the words he'd previously just been reading.
He saw vow, bond, link as well as loyalty, harmony and promise.
Alliance.
Agreement.
Affection.
"I think we've rendered him speechless," Draco said after several minutes.
Severus looked up at Draco and then at Harry.
"You're serious?" Severus finally managed to get out.
"We would have bonded with you thirty years ago, Severus." Draco took one of his hands.
"Don't make us wait thirty more," Harry added as he lay his hand on top of theirs.
While it seemed highly unlikely that Severus would live another thirty years, he nodded his acceptance. "On one condition."
"Here we go," Draco muttered. "There's always something."
Harry shot Draco a look then asked Severus, "And what's that?"
"I'm making a list for the next thirty years."
Author:
Characters/Pairings: Severus/Harry/Draco
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: ~1150
Content: Humor, established relationship, references to various sexual activities
Summary/Prompt: Prompt P19: They finally convince Severus to go through with a bonding ceremony with them.
A/N: Thanks to S for the beta! Any mistakes that remain are entirely my own.
Read at AO3 or below:
Severus had just set aside the Daily Prophet Daily Crossword and closed his eyes—Just to rest them, of course. He didn't require a nap to make it through the day as many wizards his age did. What a ridiculous notion—when a herd of Erumpents thundered down the stairs.
"We've done it!"
Severus cracked his eyes open to see Harry holding a scroll of some kind while Draco entered the library at a more civilized pace.
"Done what, dare I ask?" Severus drawled, stretching his back as he sat up more fully.
"Finished your list," Harry replied, beaming. How a man of nearly sixty still gave off such youthful exuberance, Severus didn't know. If it wasn't for the salt and pepper hair and significant lines around his eyes, one might believe Harry was only in his mid-thirties.
"What's he on about, Draco?"
"Your list." Draco smirked at him. When had he become so good at one of Severus's signature expressions? It was unsettling. He, too, looked good for his age, his silvery blond hair having turned mostly white. He kept it longer than Harry did but it still never approached the length Lucius's hair had achieved.
"What list?" He had an inkling but it was always best to feign ignorance so as to not give anything away.
"You swore an oath," Harry said, unrolling the parchment, "that you would bond with us if we completed every task on this list before you turned eighty."
"You can't possibly have done that." Severus crossed his arms over his chest and raised a brow.
Draco took the parchment and began to read. "Harry retired from the Aurors six weeks ago with all of his fingers intact."
"Potter's always been inordinately lucky," Severus said sourly, though he was, of course, quite pleased as Harry's fingers had been known to work magic on Severus's body regularly.
"Draco has equalled your skill in brewing Wolfsbane." There was a note of challenge in Harry's voice and Severus nodded his head once, conceding the point. In fact, as the master potioneer at St Mungo's, Draco's skill rivalled Severus's when it came to potions required in the healing arts.
"Harry has learned to knit a proper jumper," Draco continued. Harry threw open his robes and looked as if he was wearing something that might have come fresh off the knitting needles of Molly Weasley herself. Instead of a large letter H on the front of his jumper, there was an H and a D entwined with a letter S.
"We've travelled to all the continents with you in search of rare potions ingredients, surviving blizzards, earthquakes, tornadoes, and even that tsunami in Fogo," Harry ticked off on his fingers. "Draco's become a yoga instructor—"
"Vinyasa," Draco added.
"—which is why he's so flexible."
Severus had been wondering how Draco managed several of the positions he'd ended up in of late. It was rare that one became more flexible with age but Severus wasn't about to complain when he was so frequently the beneficiary.
"Harry learned to do that thing with his tongue."
Severus licked his lips, a shiver of anticipation running through him. "Oh?"
Harry winked. "Yeah."
"We did not kill each other before the age of fifty." Draco tsked. "You really thought so little of us when you made this list, Severus."
Severus hmphed. "What else is on that damnable list?" When he'd written it, he couldn't have imagined the three of them lasting this long together.
"Taking apart and reassembling a 1970s Muggle wireless," Harry read off, "which I did when I was recuperating from that leg injury."
"Bungee jumping and zip-lining which we did during that trip to Costa Rica for Harry's fiftieth birthday."
"We got the matching tattoos you suggested after we'd all had far too much to drink." Harry stood and tugged his waistband down to reveal the "Property of the Half-Blood Prince" tattoo on his arsecheek.
There was little that gave Severus greater pleasure than seeing Harry's and Draco's bottoms bared with his name branding their pale skin though that was usually because he was about to get a good buggering from the both of them.
"I've topped, bottomed, and found myself in the middle of a Slytherin sandwich," Harry said, coming to sit on the arm of the sofa next to Severus. "Draco has tried every position as well."
"He's worn knickers for you," Draco said, sitting down on the other side of Severus.
Revealing knickers, at that.
"Don't forget Draco's leather trousers," Harry added.
How could Severus forget those? Draco looked divine in leather.
"We've been bound and gagged," Draco continued, his hand running up Severus's thigh.
"Attended formal functions with your wicked sex toys driving us mad."
The ceremony for the thirtieth anniversary of the end of the war was permanently etched into Severus's brain. Harry and Draco had both spent the evening stimulated—perhaps overstimulated, from what he recalled of their expressions at the time—by magically enhanced butt plugs.
It was one of his finest moments, if Severus did say so himself.
"So," Harry continued, taking Severus's hand in his and lacing their fingers together, "as we've finished the list four months before your eightieth birthday, you have to bond with us."
Severus looked to Draco, hoping for support from a fellow Slytherin.
"You gave your word," Draco said solemnly.
"Let me see that parchment again," Severus said, holding out his hand. Harry handed him the scroll and Severus went over the list from beginning to end and then from bottom to top, just to be sure.
"What about this one?" Severus said triumphantly, pointing to an item two-thirds of the way down the scroll.
Draco snatched the parchment from him and examined it closely. "Hmm, he might be right."
"What?" Harry cried. "We read it over several times. What did we miss?"
Draco pointed and rolled his eyes.
Severus held firm. "The list must be complete."
Harry picked up the Daily Prophet and said softly, "Finish your crossword, Severus."
Severus put on his reading glasses and studied the puzzle anew. His heart began to race as processed the meaning of the words he'd previously just been reading.
He saw vow, bond, link as well as loyalty, harmony and promise.
Alliance.
Agreement.
Affection.
"I think we've rendered him speechless," Draco said after several minutes.
Severus looked up at Draco and then at Harry.
"You're serious?" Severus finally managed to get out.
"We would have bonded with you thirty years ago, Severus." Draco took one of his hands.
"Don't make us wait thirty more," Harry added as he lay his hand on top of theirs.
While it seemed highly unlikely that Severus would live another thirty years, he nodded his acceptance. "On one condition."
"Here we go," Draco muttered. "There's always something."
Harry shot Draco a look then asked Severus, "And what's that?"
"I'm making a list for the next thirty years."